U.S. Tops

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miaminewtimesbestof | Miami, FL | 232 Reviews

Don't go to U.S. Tops expecting to find haute couture or anything that graces the pages of Vogue. This place is bad-ass, not Bal Harbour. Think tiny tank tops; doll-size, acid-washed capris; and tight T-shirts with sexually suggestive sayings. This is a store for the young (and wannabe young) women who love door-knocker earrings, name-plate necklaces, and Sharpie lip-liner — the females popularized in 2007's "Chongalicious" song. Most of the fabric includes spandex or polyester and looks ludicrous on anyone over the age of 17 with more than three percent body fat. Prices, however, are excellent. Where else can you get a pair of pink stretchy hot pants for $4.99, other than at the flea market (which is kinda dangerous and has all those funny smells)? Still, if you're hankering for cheap club wear (or you're just cheap), this is the place to go.