"The Teenage Dance Craze" 

We're just dreaming, but here is our dream: to see dive-bar dancers whose attention to detail matches the obsession of Bay Area vintage-music DJs. For example, at Lonely Teardrops' doo-wop night about a year ago, we lost our composure and requested a Claudine Clark song. "I have one," the DJ said, looking guilty. "But Claudine Clark is girl group, not doo-wop, so I might get in trouble with the other DJs. They're pretty strict." Can you imagine the dancers who would go with that? If we were to find them, said rumpbumpers would undoubtedly show up, dressed to the goddamn nines, at The Teenage Dance Craze Party, presided over by Beatle-booted thugs DJs Sergio Iglesias, Russell Quan (pictured), and dX the Funky Gran Paw. — By Hiya Swanhuyser

Website: http://www.facebook.com/groups/67259134312

Price: $4